


For the Past Years

by twojaesotterhalf



Category: 15& (Band), GOT7
Genre: F/M, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-14
Updated: 2019-10-08
Packaged: 2019-10-27 19:45:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17773100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twojaesotterhalf/pseuds/twojaesotterhalf
Summary: In which the number of years being together isn't enough justification for love.





	1. Chapter 1

Youngjae is busy shuffling through the closet looking for a dress he gave just last year. It's a knee-high dress that complements the owner of it, as it goes with royal blue that seems to be blossoming with beautiful flowers in different sizes shimmering glitters on it. He smiled at himself when he finally found it and immediately turned around only to be met by no one. Only then he realized that the room has been quiet while he has been busy looking for the dress.

Lips pressed to a thin line, he made his way to the living room. It's past six in the evening so it is understandable that the whole house is still and in peace. Well, except for the faint giggles coming from behind the curtains just beside the aquarium across the room.

As soon as he saw it, he chuckled at the child's antics and cuteness. He shook his fondly and set down the dress on the couch and slowly, he made his way to the kid.  
"I think," he started, his voice a bit louder than usual though softness can still be heard, "someone really likes a tangerine and I actually bought a lot of them earlier."

Youngjae saw how fast the kid was already on the end side of the curtain, stopping when it's beside the aquarium. He smirked, knowing very well what his next words can do.  
"Well I guess I'll have to eat it all alone since no one's with me?" he stopped just in front of the curtain.

And as if on cue, the curtain was thrown to the other side and there revealed a frowning Dahyun who had his hands up the air and said, "No! Share it with me!"  
Youngjae bent down and scooped the kid up to the couch where he left the dress.

He grinned, "But Princess Dahyun has been bad, hasn't she?" and put her down again.

The kid pouted, tears brimming at her eyes, "Nooo, I-I am shorry! Please give Dahyun her tangerine!" she pleaded.

He sighed and crouched to be on her level. "Do you promise to be good?" The five-year-old kid immediately nodded and Youngjae chuckled at the reaction.

"Ok, then be a good Princess and wear this dress now. I'll go get the tangerines ready so you can have some before going out." He patted her head and kissed her cheek before standing up.

He went to the kitchen where he left the tangerines he bought earlier. Those were Dahyun's favorite, so he thought of buying them on the way when he saw a new stand of fruits selling it at the market.

Quietly, he washed the fruit and arranged them on a fruit basket and got some pieces to peel for them to eat. When he was cleaning the kitchen, Dahyun walked in, peering on the side from the kitchen's doorway, her curious eyes following Youngjae's movement.

"Oh, you are done." Youngjae smiled when he saw the child.

She nodded and went to him. Hugging just his waist and pressing her cheeks on the sides of Youngjae—a thing she does when she feels bad for something. He then slowly got some space between them and cupped her cheeks. "Do you want to eat your tangerines now?" he asked, and got a hyper Dahyun back again. He carried Dahyun by her waist and helped her sit on the stool. Youngjae fed him tangerine and the kid happily grinned at him.

"How was it? Did I got the right ones?"

"It is great! But.. uhh, where are we going?" She asked, head tilting on the side.

Youngjae cooed at it and caressed her cheeks, "what do you mean 'we'? Did you forget you'll be going out on a date with your dad?"

Dahyun immediately stopped eating and looked at him, a tangerine in her hand mid-way to her mouth, and asked him with a frown. "Dad and I will?"

He fondly poked the tip of her nose, albeit cooing when the kid adorably scrunched her nose up from the action. "You really are your dad's, no? Well, when dad was dropping you at school earlier he told you to be ready after school since he proposed today is a 'Dahyun day', but you were so excited to meet your friends and even before he got to finish saying anything you ran out of the car." He chuckled and ruffled the messy short hair of the kid who is now pouting at him.

"Is daddy mad?"

"He can't be mad at you, remember? You just have to be good today, ok?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is cross-posted on wattpad. Since I decided to continue writing this story, I posted it here too. Comments and kudos are highly appreciated! yayy to my first published 2jae au story!


	2. Chapter 2

_flashback_

 

It's a Saturday afternoon, where they mostly spend it on cuddling but right now they also decided to watch a movie. Well, more like Youngjae wanted to watch it. But it's not like he can just say no to him when he all pleads cutely, and _damn_ , was he in love.

 

So here they are at their flat, cradling Youngjae in his arms while the younger was sniffling at the scene playing on the screen. And as if on cue he paused the movie while the brunette in his arms sobbed quite loudly.

 

"Hey, baby." He cooed, trying to calm him by carding his fingers to his soft locks. "Don't be sad." Youngjae looked up at him, eyes red from all the crying he did from watching the movie. "I'm not sad. I'm happy," he defended.

 

Youngjae suddenly sat up straight and looked at him, so he mirrored his position and waits for what he has to say. He knows his boyfriend will be saying something again. Considering the years of being together, the older still can't catch on what the younger is thinking at times, or so to anticipate what his boyfriend is going to say. So he looks at the younger attentively because it is not like they haven't watched Zootopia for the first time and Youngjae getting emotional over that part.

 

"You know... when Mr. Otter woke up, and then- and then his wife was so happy he's fine, and finally with them... I just…," he looked up at him still sobbing a little as he tries his best to point out what he wants to say, "I feel something. Something like I'm a part of that family. Jaebeom is that fine?" he asks, mind not able to rationalize what he just said.

Jaebeom gaped at his boyfriend. He knows Youngjae is unpredictable at most times but he hadn't thought up to what level. Guess he never will know and it will always leave him falling for the other harder.

 

He ducks his head when a chuckle escaped his mouth. "Hey! Don't laugh at me!" Youngjae smacked Jaebeom on his shoulder with a pout, because Youngjae is serious about his question.

 

"Oh, baby," Jaebeom called after he recovered from it, reaching for Youngjae. But the younger is quite upset, so he crosses his arms on his chest while huffing. "Babe, you are too cute to be mad. Are you really?" He once again laughed at the younger's antic. Youngjae will really be the death of me.

 

"But Hyung!"

 

"Ok, Ok I get it!" he surrendered. Both hands up his front to Youngjae as he tries to stifle his laughs. Youngjae just narrowed his eyes at him. So Jaebeom sighed happily and scooped the brunette off the floor and settled him to his lap. Youngjae naturally snakes his arms around Jaebeom's neck, while the older secured the younger on his lap, hugging him by his waist.

 

"Hey Jae," he called, fondness obvious on both his voice and stare. "Whether you are a part of the otter family—that even Jackson believes you are one." That earned him a whine and a light smack on his chest, but he continued, a smirk growing widely on his face, "Just so you know that I'll love you anyways, with all your quirkiness, odd thinking, or even your trial and error cooking of my favorite kimchi soup. I'll accept that. I accepted that wholeheartedly." He finished with a loving smile on his face, caressing the younger's face softly.

 

Youngjae's eyes become glassy again, now out of the love he also feels. The feeling of being loved is so overwhelming he feels like bursting right now. But he just smiled, eyes like moon crescents, cheeks up, and his tears that won't stop at the moment.

He nodded and rested their foreheads together. "Jaebummie, why are you making me cry again?" he asked in his exaggerated cute voice that has the older roar in laughter


	3. Chapter 3

Youngjae woke up from the smell of food and smiling at how much the aroma smells familiar. He looked at the bedside where the digital clock is and reads its thirty-five after twelve that he realizes it's the brunch he is going to have. So he quickly went to their bathroom to freshen up and straight to the kitchen after.

 

Just right in the time, Youngjae saw his boyfriend plating what he had cooked. The younger immediately melted at the sight being so domestic for him, especially when the older looked up at him and a warm smile was sent his way. Without a second thought, he went to him and back hugged his boyfriend who is busy arranging their table.

 

"Good morning, Babe." Youngjae greeted and showered the other with small kisses on places he can reach, mostly on the neck where the other is actually ticklish. The receiver giggled and turned around while he holds him on the waist, so the other clung on his neck.

 

"It's good noon for you, Youngjae." The older snickered and bopped the other’s nose by his finger.

 

The younger scrunched his nose from the action. "Hyung~ stop, my nose is getting itchy," he complained.

 

By that, he instantly got a worried boyfriend and felt hands all over his face. "I'm sorry. Sorry." He apologized repeatedly and Youngjae now has to wiggle his way out of his hold, giggling.

 

"Hyung! It's ok now. Let's just eat before it gets cold. I'm sure it's yet another masterpiece from you. So what is this?" The couple settled down on their seats across each other.

 

"Hmm, well that's beef soup. And stop giving me that look as if this is the first I have cooked that! I'm sure you have smelled it earlier that is why you are being clingy to me this early." The younger smiled widely at him while the other is having a heart attack from the sight in front, of course in a good way.

 

"I know that but you always make this special, even so, it is my favorite," he confessed sheepishly, blush coating his cheeks.

  
  


 

"Hey, Jae," the older called after they washed their dishes. Youngjae hummed to let the other know he is listening.

 

"Today is Saturday, right?"

 

Youngjae tilted his head slightly to the side, trying to remember the day today. After a minute, he nodded his head hesitantly. "Yeah, I think so. Since yesterday I was the one who got Dahyun from school and then we went to the mall after."

 

The other turned and leaned on the sink, nodding at the answer and crossing his arms over his chest, eyeing the younger intently. "Right, are we supposed to meet her today?"

 

Youngjae shook his head while busy drying his hands with the kitchen towel. "No. Jaebeom told me they are going for the weekends instead and bargained to me that I can have her the whole week next. He also said that if Dahyun wants, she can stay here instead of going back and forth," he finished explaining, grinning at the older from excitement. The older saw it. Youngjae’s eyes twinkling with expectation and happiness of having Dahyun all by himself, with them, in their home.

 

"That would be great."

 

Youngjae nodded and hugged him tightly and looked up at him with the smile the older has been so familiar yet it always brings his heart into a race whenever he sees it.

 

"I love you, Jinyoung hyung," Youngjae said, leaning in for a kiss.

 

"I love you too, Youngjae," he answered, breathless.


	4. Chapter 4

_Flashback_

 

"He's totally staring at you!"

 

Startled, Youngjae almost slipped the lunch box he's holding. He looked at his right, glaring at his friend. "Yugyeom! What are you shouting for?!" He hissed.

 

The taller male shrugged, averting his eyes to anywhere except his friend, scared. "In my defense, I was whisper shouting."

 

Youngjae continued on glaring at his friend. He knows who the other was referring to but would rather not talk about it. He's been actually avoiding it, getting protests from his friends but he could care less. He doesn't have that much interest on it anyway.

 

"You know, I won't be surprised if one day he corners you and asks you out." His Thai friend commented on his other side.

 

"That's creepy, Bam."

 

"Well, won't be news, considering he's been staring at you for so long." Youngjae rolled his eyes. "One thing that amuses me here is how he can be patient like that."

 

Finally collecting his cool, Yugyeom looked at his friend in confusion. "He actually knows what patience is?" He snickered. Youngjae chuckled himself, covering his mouth that is currently full of kimchi rice.

 

 _Gross_ , Bambam thought.

 

"You all can ignore whatever's going on in this hell hole, but you guys, and I, both know that if he wants something he gets it in no time." Bambam noted, seemingly proud of his observation.

 

Youngjae knows this. Everybody does. It's not like it's hard to notice it when the other is literally the Golden Boy of their school. You would know anything about him even though you don't partake in his fan club's gossip. Words travel as fast as light.

 

"I just hope he doesn't."

 

This time Bambam rolled his eyes.

 

 

 

 

Except that Youngjae met him.

 

It's not like how bambam thought it'll take place. With all the typical bad boy look he had, his Thai friend will always sputter out how Jaebeom will bad ass-ly corner him _on your locker and lean down to your level and say "hey pretty", like, c'mon that's probably something he'll do? Right?!_ And sometimes, all Youngjae needed is for Bambam to stop daydreaming.

 

But more than what he has to go through with his friends, he'd say it's bearable. It's something he knows he's bound to live with no matter how spontaneous the other two are.

 

But Jaebeom?

 

He feels strange.

 

When Jaebeom approached him, it's not solely for the reason of going after Youngjae. And as cliche as it was, they were paired in a class they were both enrolled. Music.

 

Being able to work and interact with a Jaebeom, gave Youngjae a definitely new height of viewing him. And more than once does he has to take a step back because it just doesn't make sense.

 

How even, a human being like Jaebeom, would ever look his way?

 

But apparently...

 

 _"Yeah, well, they aren't really wrong."_ The older shrugged cooly, a hint of smugness at the tip of his lips, turning to look at Youngjae. Squinting, as he faces the side where the sun finally sets after a long day of shining above their heads. _"I actually think I've been pretty bad about it."_ He said with a resigned tone, leaning back at the tree behind him. As they've been in the park where they always prefer to meet up and owned it as their working place.

 

 _"About what?"_ He asked intellectually.

 

Jaebeom chuckled, face adorned with the slightest blush. _"I never thought you are this oblivious. Come on, Jae. When your two crack heads of a friend told me you can be at times be dense, that couldn't possibly mean it also comes as you being unaware. You're smarter than this."_

_"Well, but then if you meant of having a validation. Then yes, I've been staring at you."_

 

Blushing at that moment seems to be something he can only do. All the retaliation he had on what Jaebeom said earlier, died before it can even come out of his tongue. Jaebeom didn't let him breathe, and full on attacked him on something he's been desperately trying to stay away.

 

 _"But hey,"_ Jaebeom called when Youngjae didn't verbally comment back for what felt like an hour, _"there are reasons I've been only allowing myself to admire you from the distance."_

 

Youngjae finally stopped trying to make the grass look like they interest him and glanced back at the other with curiosity painting his face.

 

 _"I expected this reaction. You, avoiding me because of what I feel, and I'm actually really glad you aren't running away from me right now. But it's also because I know what happened."_ Youngjae turned away. _"And...,"_ the other trailed, his gears busy trying to sort the pros and cons of saying what he's been meaning. But no, that's impossible for now. His mind is a jumble of every word he's imagined saying to the younger, accompanied by the loud beating of his heart. And in the end, all he can do is sigh as he bows down his head in defeat. _"It's too early... to even mention it. But, whatever it is, I want it with you. Seriously. And I'm willing to wait."_

 

And how, in this world, can Youngjae ever fathom Lim Jaebeom going all through that because of him?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, im sorry it took me this long to update but ive been busy with school and life. also, apologizing for the errors in this chapter as this is still unbeta'd. so yep, thank you so much for all the kudos and comment on the chapters from before. i truly appreciate and read them.


	5. Chapter 5

"Coming!" Jinyoung shouted from the living room. Getting himself up from the book he's reading and went to open the door.

Well, if Jinyoung still remembers it right, he doesn't have to face the person in front of him right now. Trying to compose a neutral expression he looked around quickly and only then he realized that the person isn't alone.

Jinyoung crouched down to level the other, a smile automatically gracing his figures. He couldn't help, no one does, when a cute little kid is in front of you holding her yellow plush bear with a red scarf that Yugyeom gifted her because according to that giant baby, he very much looked like the plushie.

"Hey Dahyun, how are you?" He asked, carefully ruffling her hair that made the kid giggle and hugged the plushie even closer with her left arm.

"I'm good, uncle! Daddy said I am going to stay here that's why I brought a lot of toys! I hope you can play with me too." The kid happily and politely informed.

The smile only grew much bigger on Jinyoung. She's definitely Youngjae's. "Of course, we can also ask Papa to join us, right?"

The kid nodded happily, albeit bouncing on her feet at the prospect of being with her Papa and favorite Uncle.

A cough broke the trance Jinyoung was in, and it took all that he has to stop himself from rolling his eyes. He stood up to meet the eyes of the other man, raising his brows as to demand the other to explain why he had to interrupt.

"I called Youngjae," this time Jinyoung didn't suppress to raised his brow higher, looking a bit mean, "and he told me he can't go home early today so I can just go ahead and drop Dahyun here with some of her belongings, as always." Jinyoung can feel the other hold back a wince. He wanted to scoff. It's not like he's pleased to see him either.

He held his hand out to take the bags from the other. "Ok. Well, let me handle it from here." He said and looked towards the kid. "You can say bye to your Dad, for now, Dahyun."

The kid nodded and motioned to his Dad to crouch down her level to give him a hug. It's Jinyoung's turn to go back to the living room for a while and settle down the kid's belonging. When he came back, they are still in the same position but when the other saw Jinyoung walking back he went back to standing and just ruffled his kid's head. "Listen to Papa well, ok?"

"I will, Daddy! Take care!" Dahyun happily said and went to Jinyoung's side by the door. She waved and threw a flying kiss for the man to catch and she giggled with her plushie tight on her chest.

Jinyoung is about to turn around and close the door when the other moved his hand in the air, he stopped and held the doorknob looking across him.   
The other cleared his throat. "Take care of the two and have a great time."

"We will, Jaebeom."

 

 

 

Youngjae would have thought that Jinyoung was just tired if not for that he knows who came by just this afternoon and that he is just clearly ignoring him and has taken an escape from giving Dahyun all his attention. It could have been also from exhaustion because Jinyoung has been with Dahyun and knowing his child- it is possible. He would have not given any heed to it if not for the cold responses he gets for the questions he purposely asked with the demand for explanations from the other.

So when Jinyoung went to their room to get Dahyun's pajama, he immediately followed him after telling his kid to behave for a while. He cornered Jinyoung in their room, locked the door, and waited for the other's response.

"I'm sorry." Jinyoung is the first one to break the tensed atmosphere in the room. He knows he wouldn't be able to avoid it anyway.

At times like this, Youngjae feels torn and useless. They've been over this topic ever since it was brought up and yet all they have discussed seemed to be still fruitless as they still get to this point.

"And I will always tell you to not be." Youngjae went to back hug the older who still has his back on him the entire time, standing in front of their bed. "Your feelings towards it is valid, you can be upset, mad, or disappointed, but please, these emotions aren't worthy anymore and you know that." He held Jinyoung tightly and the older held his hands from that position.

"Things have been done. I know that some events from the past can't be taken lightly but lingering on it wouldn't get us anywhere but back in the past. And we don't need that because I want to be able to bond with everyone, even Jaebeom. Peacefully and civil. Then live life as I have envisioned to be doing all of it with you."

Jinyoung turned around, eyes a bit glassy, and cupped Youngjae's cheek with both his hands.

"Thank you for being patient," He choked on a sob, while Youngjae draws smooth circles on the back of Jinyoung's hand that is on his face, "and the best partner anyone could ever ask for."

"I try." Youngjae cheekily answered, trying to lighten the mood.

"I know and I will too. This time for real."

"That's everything I could ask for."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> is anyone confused?


	6. Chapter 6

_Flashback_

Yugyeom kept on checking his phone. Clicking the power button only to be welcomed by his clear notification lock screen. He wasn't waiting for a message anyway, just wanting to find something to occupy himself aside from pacing around or biting his nails for instance.

On the other side of the sofa, sat Bambam with his straight posture, arms folded against his chest. He is boring holes through staring on the wall in front of him, but behind all the calmness he's showing off, he wants nothing but to scream his head off on top of a building.

It was still, and it is not at the same time. If anyone is there to witness the two, they'd think it's perfect to put video effects wherein its raining behind them– a storm.

They waited silently at the living room, as patiently as they can muster. Given the moment they are in, it's a challenge for the two but this is those moments that they set aside their goofiness and pulls off their seriousness that not much have witnessed. But even in the quietness of their friend's room, they can still hear the raging storm from afar. Not quite close, but they can already feel it's heaviness. A blessing, but the unapologizing thunder still struck down where they are, it's here. It's happening, and as much as they want this to be over and rewind back to where they could have avoided this moment, they still think they wouldn't. Because if they are being honest, they have seen this coming and were just waiting for the confirmation. Something tangible, a piece of visible evidence that it is indeed happening.

They immediately averted their attention to the bathroom door when they heard it open. The soft click of the door's lock is incomparable to how loud the thumping of their heart is when they saw their friend. Youngjae just stood there, leaning, eyes trained to the hardwood floor, his right hand gripping the end of his hoodie tightly and on the other where he held the device much tighter if possible.

They went to hug him. After all, they really don't need a verbal confirmation.

  
\---

  
Youngjae rubbed at his sleepy eyes, hands wet from the tears he wasn't able to contain. He's still in their dorm, which he originally thought would be a bit different than most days but he just wiped his eyes vigorously. Not much will change it now.

His phone alarm rang out. It's 11:59 PM, reminding him that soon another new day will start, but it wasn't for that reason. He has always had that habit, setting the alarm minutes before a special event ends so he can be one of those people who will get to do the last greetings. Silly, but it makes him happy and it's stuck to him since and doesn't have any reason to change it. Probably, except that day.

He sighed and dragged himself to his own room, not forgetting to bring the key with him so he won't be disturbed by anyone.

He'll try to sleep. Youngjae thought it will have to be the last time he'll go to sleep at such an hour. He needs enough energy and to take extra care of himself anyway. He's tired to bones, still a bit hungry, and just sad.

_Don't I deserve better?,_ he thought before falling asleep.

  
\---

  
Not an hour later, Jaebeom went to what was becoming a lonely place of them. He would just normally make a beeline to their shared room and lay down to play with his phone until he's lull himself thru that to sleep, but not when he saw the status of their humble living room.

It's decorated in small balloons of red and white, and the place is spotless. It is even a bit strange how the place smelled strongly of lavender. When he walked the few steps to their dining and kitchen, there's even a lot going on there.

Two white candles have been halfway melted, the plates were still plated with its dishes, and there is a lot, most he can name because it is his favorite foods, but what really caught his attention was the small banner hanging on the wall.

_Happy birthday_ , it says.

His heart stopped beating for a second and immediately fished out his phone.

_1:31 AM_   
_September 18_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope it's not that bad??? hehe also, we're nearing to the finish line ;) 
> 
> Thank you for all the kudos and comments, it's highly appreciated!


	7. Chapter 7

“Going to university? But it’s only Tuesday?” Jinyoung wondered as he saw Youngjae looking for his stuff for school.

Youngjae looked back from his study table and smiled slightly. “That’s what I told Jihyo earlier but it’s something seeming urgent and it’s a major subject so I couldn’t really ditch it.”

Jinyoung looked around the messy table of his boyfriend and started organizing things Youngjae left behind as he saw him zip his bag.

“And work?"

“I called everyone I should and it’s good.”

“Just remember to have lunch. I know it’s your thesis.”

“I will, Sir!” Youngjae chuckled as he stood up, satchel bag on his right shoulder. “Hey, my kiss,” he called.

Jinyoung gratefully leaned in for a brief one. 

“See you later. I love you.”

“I love you.”

 

If anything, running isn’t his forte or sports in general and he only ever use it whenever he has to run for his life after he has teased Jackson or Mark. So Bambam was out of breath when he has reached the third floor of his friend’s apartment building all the way from his class far from their campus.

He knocked at the door relentlessly as he called at his friend. “Open the door!” he shouted from the hallway. “Youngjae!”

Only then when Bambam got tired and was left motionless leaning beside the door, to recharge, did it open.

He was about to raise his voice again because he’s annoyed but all of those were down the drain once he has seen his friend. He immediately went to hug him after a second to which the brunette leaned in for support as his legs gave in. The tears that he has kept on were shed on his friend’s reliable shoulder.

Bambam, still loss for the moment, managed to get them on his friend’s small living room and to the sofa. He made sure Youngjae was at least comfortably sitting while he tightened his hug on him and caressed his back.

“Are you ready to tell me about it now?” Bambam asked after Youngjae has finally calmed down and is only left on sniffling.

“I… I’m moving out,” Youngjae responded, tears making its way back to his eyes.

Knowing where his friend is going, Bambam shook his head in disbelief. “No way! Didn’t we tell you to talk to him first? We know he’s busy but he can’t be only staying at his studio all the time!” He stared in disbelief. ”This is his house too, in case he has forgotten!”

“We did talk,” Youngjae sadly told his friend. “We did. It was…” Youngjae didn’t want to say it. He feels like vomiting again. He can feel his skin crawl and he might need another shower to clean himself. He feels dirty, betrayed, and heartbroken. “He said he can’t be… be a… Father.” But then again, he owes this to his friends. They needed to know so they weren’t left in the dark. He feels like even after all the tears and pain that he has to feel whenever he has to recall that night, they deserve to know.

Bambam, on the other hand, feels like he’s been thrown cold water. The pricking cold on his skin, small and barely noticeable but will surely leave a wound. But for now, he just knows it’s there, growing inside of him. Freezing his whole system.

“I’m sorry,” he said, looking at his friend.

“You don’t have to be. It was my fault. Our fault,” Youngjae corrected. He reached out to cup Bambam’s face and wipe the tears the younger has unknowingly shed as he continually and quietly cries on his own. “We talked the week after my  _fun_ birthday. He said that he wasn’t ready and wasn’t really expecting it to be happening this early.”

“Dumbass already knew you can bear a child and yet you did unsafe sex and then three months later, he suddenly says he’s not ready?!”

“I know, I already told him that,” Youngjae chuckled a bit. Now leaning back on the sofa and staring on their ceiling. “I told him. Reminded him that night three months ago and to those other times but he could really be careless. This time his pull out game was just really weak.”

“Stop trying to make yourself laugh right now. You sounded like a masochist who’s having fun at his own misery.”

Youngjae couldn’t help but cry again as he recalled another moment of that night. ”He wanted an abortion! He told me to get rid of it, Bam!” he wailed in pain.

That day, the two spent the rest of it in each other’s embrace, crying and comforting. No one said another word even when Bambam helped him pack all of his belongings.

When they were at Jackson’s car with all of Youngjae’s stuff ready to move into their shared house, Bambam held his hand tightly.

“How about the school, Jae?”

“I’ll worry about it later.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the topic on this chapter is a bit heavy;;; so, if it wasn't still obvious this is also an mpreg au hehe


End file.
